But whether you intend to tie the knot, pop the question, or just have a fun-filled weekend away with your special someone, Las Vegas has a number of romantic spots that could make your Valentine’s Day 2004 extra special. Here, in alphabetical order, are my selections for ten romantic spots in Vegas:

Alize – The dim lighting, the stunning views from the top of the Palms hotel tower, and the exceptional French/Continental cuisine all add up to make this the most romantic restaurant in all of Las Vegas. Have yourself a fantastic meal and then have the waiter deliver the ring as dessert!

Bellagio Fountain Shows – Fountains are a symbol of romance so imagine taking the romance factor up a couple thousand notches with this magical water, light, and sound show. Here’s how I envision it: nighttime, the cannons are blasting water a hundred feet in the air behind you, the sound system is blasting Andrea Bocelli’s “Con Te Partiro,” and you lean in for that perfect kiss… nice!

Bette Midler Show – This is a special one, only for Valentine’s Day 2004. The irrepressible Bette Midler will be performing February 14th at the MGM Grand and I can tell you that it’s one of the best shows I have ever seen. Wait until she gets to “Wind Beneath My Wings” or “The Rose” or “Tenderly” or “Skylark” or… well, the list of romantic songs goes on and on and holding hands with a significant other while being serenaded by the Divine Miss M sounds like a great Valentine’s Day present to me.

Chocolate Swan – To heck with those cheesy heart-shaped boxes of generic chocolate, head to the Chocolate Swan at Mandalay Bay for some truly delightful confections guaranteed to send any heart aflutter. Here’s a hint – although you may want to order a bunch of stuff for yourself and swat away your spouse’s hand every time it nears your plate, get something to share (a piece of cheesecake and a chocolate truffle or two perhaps) along with an after-dinner cordial and you’ve set the perfect prelude to romance.

Eiffel Tower Experience – Okay, so you can’t afford to go to the actual City of Lights so you’ll have to make due with the Paris in the Nevada desert. But here’s the good news: the views of The Strip from the top of the Eiffel Tower replica are stunning and quite romantic, especially at night while the Bellagio Fountain Shows are going off across the street. This would be another terrific proposal spot!

Gondolas at Venetian – Again, it may not be quite as romantic as the real gondolas in the real Venice, Italy, but there’s something about riding the gondolas at The Venetian that inspires the lover in us all. Of course you’ll have to block out all of the tourists watching you as you float down the middle of the mall or around the front of the hotel, but if you can bring your sense of irony this is still a fun, one-of-a-kind Vegas experience that you should try with someone you love.

Lake Las Vegas – This is, without a doubt, the most scenic of locals in the entire area – a perfect spot to spend Valentine’s Day. You could just take a walk around the lake and through the Italian village where they plan on having strolling violinists, horse-drawn carriage rides, and cupids to hand out treats. The local perfume store Alexander’s will be custom mixing fragrances and other boutiques will be offering special treats and discounts. Or you could go whole hog and try one of the “romance” packages at the local resorts. For instance at the Lake Las Vegas resort you can get a suite stocked with chocolate and champagne plus a gondola cruise on the lake with more chocolate and champagne or a three-course dinner at the Como Steakhouse for prices starting around $550. They’ll even arrange to have your sweetheart find a bottle floating in the lake with a custom message or marriage proposal inside.

The Ritz-Carlton – No one does luxury like the Ritz-Carlton at Lake Las Vegas and their Valentine’s Day packages are no exception. They have simple packages starting around $300 that sound lovely but you want to really blow the roof off the joint, don’t you? Well, you could try the Cinderella Marriage Proposal Package where $995 will get you two-nights in a lake-view room, champagne and strawberries, massages, dinner, a butler-drawn bath surrounded by three-dozen red roses, and a rose-petal turndown service that will cover the bed in rose petals and place your engagement ring inside a glass slipper. But if you really want to impress your special someone go for the Ritz-Carlton’s Valentine’s Fantasy Package. You really should be sitting down for this… it includes: three nights in a 2,400-square-foot suite; chocolate, champagne, cigars, and caviar; a private stargazing excursion next to your own bonfire complete with butler-prepared s’mores; unlimited use of the spa; an on-call butler; unlimited golf; breakfast in bed each morning; two Bvlgari watches; and his and her brand-new Mercedes CLK convertibles… that you get to take home with you!!! Yes, you read that right – you get to keep the cars! The cost of this little Valentine’s Day adventure? $125,000.

Mystere – Of all the regular production shows in town, Mystere is probably the most romantic and moving of the bunch. The high-flying gymnastics and acrobatics are done in such a awe-inspiring visual style that it has been known to bring a tear to the eye of even the most cynical of audience goers. Whether you want to be amazed or be moved, Mystere offers a terrific opportunity to experience a truly unique Vegas show experience with someone you care about.

Stratosphere Tower – The Eiffel Tower has great up-close views but it’s hard to beat the vista from the observation deck, restaurant, or lounge over 100 stories above Las Vegas. Go for dinner, drinks, or just to watch the world go by below and if you feel like asking the big question you can say you did it at the Top of the World. Just don’t sing the Carpenter’s song while you’re doing it. Bad form.

What do I need in order to get married in Vegas?
A willing participant would be a good first start, but after that all you need is a marriage license from the Clark County Marriage Bureau. A license from your state is no good here.

Where do I get a license?
The Clark County Marriage Bureau is located at the Clark County Courthouse, 200 South 3rd Street in Downtown Las Vegas. They are open Sunday through Thursday from 8am until midnight and Fridays, Saturdays, and holidays 24 hours a day. Amazing but true.

How much does it cost?
$55.00 in cash only - no checks or credit cards are accepted.

Do I need to make an appointment?
No, just show up. Although be warned that you may have a substantial wait, especially on busy weekends or holiday periods. Budget a couple of hours for this process.

Is there anything I need to bring with me?
Your partner - both must be present and accounted for in order to get a license. You also will need to prove how old you are (with a birth certificate, driver's license, passport, or the like) and provide your social security number.

Do I need to get a blood test first?
Nope - they'll trust you.

Is there a waiting period?
As Ms. Spears proved so efficiently, no - there's no waiting period. So if you want to marry that guy you met a couple of hours ago in line at the seafood buffet, you're good to go.

How old do you have to be?
18 is the minimum age although you can get married as young as 16 if you have parental consent.

I'm divorced. Do I need to bring along any paperwork or proof?
All you really need is to know the month, year, city, and state in which it was final but bring along the papers anyway. It's not required but it'll help speed up the process.

How do I contact the Clark County Marriage Bureau if I have more questions?
You can call them at 702-455-4415 or you can visit the Clark County Marriage License Information website.

Where should I get married?
Las Vegas has hundreds of wedding chapels and it really depends on what you’re looking for. You can go traditional with the flowers and gown and candles or you can go wacky with an Elvis impersonator or you can just drive through in your rental car on the way to the next casino. We have two pages on Vegas4Visitors devoted to some of our favorite wedding chapels: independent chapels and those in hotels.

But don’t look at that as a demotion. We think the more intimate room at the Golden Nugget and the overall Downtown sensibility are better for the Amazing Johnathan’s sensibility – or lack there of.

Get there early enough and you'll get a pretty good idea of what you're in for as a roving camera broadcasts big-screen images of audience members with captions. Some of it is pretty juvenile (show the group of Asian people and put the words "Ahh! Godzilla" underneath them, hilarity ensues) but this is not aiming to be any other than an ice breaker with questionable taste so leave your righteous indignation at the door.

Johnathan opens his show with the aid of "Psychic Tanya," the epitome of every dumb-blonde magician's assistant. She makes the perfect dim-bulb foil to Johnathan's sarcastic know-it-all and their first bit, where he winds up affixing playing cards on her face with a staple gun, wrapping her head in tape, and then shoving scissors into her skull is both demented and laugh-out-loud funny (even if it doesn't actually sound all that funny on paper).

Tanya pops up throughout the show and is hilarious every time - whatever she's being paid, it isn't enough.

Next Johnathan grabs an unsuspecting audience member for an extended bit that is essentially designed to make the poor guy look like an idiot. When I say extended, I mean extended - this guy was on stage for about an hour and what started with a "rip the $20 bill in half" trick progressed through card tricks, mind bending riddles, some gross-out stunts, and lots and lots of ridicule for both the guy on stage and the audience in general.

As mentioned, there isn't a lot of actual "magic" in The Amazing Johnathan's show. It's more of a comic deconstruction of magic acts, where he'll set up one of those tricks that you've seen a million times and then find some excuse to not actually finish it or twist it in a way you hadn't been expecting. In other words, you want to see cars disappear go see Lance Burton. You want a good laugh, go see the Amazing Johnathan.

A friendly warning - this show is not for the faint of heart. It can be quite crude in language and content so the easily offended may want to apply elsewhere.

Vegas4Visitors Grade: A-

The Amazing Johnathan
The Golden Nugget
129 E. Fremont Street
Las Vegas, NV 89101
866-946-5336
Website
Tickets: $55 per person plus taxes and fees, no one under 18 allowed without a parent or guardian
Showtimes: Nightly except Monday at 10pm

Jay Leno is bringing The Tonight Show back to Vegas for a week of shows in May. The late night comic will tape from the now mostly unused showroom at Paris Las Vegas starting May 10th, the third time in the last ten years that The Tonight Show has visited Sin City.

Your wallet can get a little lighter the next time you head to one of the Coast Casinos, and this time it’s not just because you’re going to lose money. The four hotels in the corporate chain, Orleans, Suncoast, Barbary Coast, and Gold Coast have begun the process of combining their separate players’ clubs into one entity so you’ll only have to carry one of those plastic cards instead of four. Right now only Orleans and Gold Coast are on the plan but the other two casinos should be following suit shortly.

The rumors are flying fast and furious in the local Las Vegas press about yet another Cirque du Soleil show going into The Mirage to replace Siegfried & Roy. Of course no one official is saying anything officially yet but the “where there’s smoke there’s fire” school of thinking suggests that this is pretty much a done deal.

They haven’t even turned a shovel full of dirt yet but you can already buy a condominium in a future luxury building at The MGM Grand. The Residences at MGM Grand, as it will be called, will be as many as six 40-story condo towers built at the northeast corner of the hotel property. Ground breaking on the first of the towers is expected this summer with completion by late 2005 but you can get a sneak peak at the sales and information office in the MGM Grand’s Studio Walk shopping area. Of course as you would expect the units won’t be cheap… a low-floor studio will start around $350,000 with the high-end penthouse suites around $1.5 million.

And finally, if you’ve always dreamed of being a star on the Vegas stage, you have an opportunity to fulfill that dream with open auditions for an upcoming multi-million production. Of course the only hitch is that you may not be recognizable to friends and family since you’ll made up as a Borg. The new attraction being added to the Star Trek Experience at the Las Vegas Hilton will be called Borg Invasion 4D and they are looking for a few good Borg, Starfleet officers, and Ferengi to bring the whole thing to life. If, unlike myself, you actually understood the words in the previous sentence, you can visit the attraction and ask for an application or send a head shot and resume to STAR TREK: The Experience, Las Vegas Hilton, 3000 Paradise Road, Las Vegas, NV 89109. May the force be with you.

Star Wars. I know… it’s just a joke.

Scroll down for the answer.

The Weekly Trivia Question is sponsored by
The Vegas4Visitors.com Online Las Vegas Memorabilia Museum

Question: Which hotel will be imploded next?

Answer: That's a good question, Joe. Unfortunately there is no specific answer since as of this writing there are no scheduled hotel closings that could lead to an implosion. Of course, this being Vegas, things change quickly and there are a lots of places that are at the top of the list of “Hotels Most Likely To Be Imploded.”

Rumors are rampant that the Tropicana will close in May or shortly thereafter. The owners of the hotel are denying they’ve made any firm decisions but that seems to be the common wisdom around town. If they do close the hotel, they will most like tear it down and build one or two mega-resorts on the land. That means one or both of the existing hotel towers could get imploded to make way for new construction.

Up the street, the owner of the New Frontier is deep into negotiation to redevelop the property. This has been going on for years but it sounds like things are heating up and there could be an announcement within the next couple of months that could lead to a closure and implosion of the oldest hotel on The Strip.

Other hotels on the "hit list" include The Riviera, The Boardwalk, and The Stardust, all of which have been rumored to be under consideration for redevelopment. Just recently we've heard new rumors about the Imperial Palace possibly being sold to Harrah’s so they can tear it down and build a new resort next door to their existing one.

But at this point, all of the above is just rumors. Keep reading the column and as soon as I know if one of them becomes fact I’ll report it here.

Question: Where can we find 2-for-1 buffet coupons when we arrive in Las Vegas?

Answer: I get this kind of question a lot and the sad reality is that Vegas is not quite the coupon kingdom that it used to be. Certainly there are ways to get bargains, but don’t fool yourself into thinking you’re going to get the cream of the buffet/show/attraction crop for a discount just for picking up the newspaper.

In other words, you may find a 2-for-1 coupon for one of the inexpensive and less popular daytime shows, but you’ll never find one for “O” or “Celine Dion.” They sell out almost every performance at more than $100 per ticket – why would they want to print coupons?

Same applies to buffets. Most of the ones you’ll probably want to visit are so successful that they don’t need to lure people in with discount offers.

Having said all that, the places to look for coupons are as follows:

Check-in package – many hotels will include coupons or offers for restaurants, attractions, or shows in their hotel with the material they give you upon checking in. If they don’t give you something, ask if they have any deals going on during your stay.

In Room Magazines – In almost all hotel rooms you’ll find magazines like “Showbiz” and “What’s On,” local glossy publications that say every restaurant and every show in town is “Amazing!” Ignore their hype and pay attention to the advertisements – many of which include coupons.

Newspapers – The weekend entertainment section (usually out on Thursday or Friday) of both the Las Vegas Review Journal and Las Vegas Sun are packed with ads and discount offers. I recently found a 2-for-1 for one of my favorite show, “Second City Improv” at the Flamingo.

The Internet – The hotel, show, and attraction websites will sometimes offer Internet coupons that can be printed and redeemed when visiting. For instance, you can get into the Auto Collections at the Imperial Palace for free by using a printable Internet coupon from their website. It’s worth taking the time to do some online surfing – you can find links to most of the hotels, shows, and attractions in the various sections of Vegas4Visitors.com